Great Kanuckistanis (I)

The Kanuckistani people are not all cute fluffy bunny rabbits. No, not at all.

Case in point. Former Kanuckistani Minister of Public Works and the main cause of transatlantic tensions between the Kingdom of Denmark and the Democratic People’s Republic of Kanuckistan (DPRK), Liberal Party capo Alfonso Gagliano was recently fingered by the FBI as being the Cosa Nostra’s Man in Montreal. In addition, he had previously been an accountant to a certain Don Caruana of the infamous Sicilian Caruana-Cuntrera group.

This begs the question of course, as to what the mob nickname of Don Gagliano would be. Since he was in company of such leading men of honour as Sammy “The Bull” Gravano, “Big” Paul Castellano, and of course, the head of the Bonano crime family, the recently deceased Joey “Bananas”, he would need a nickname, one that reflected his stature as a made man, while also reflecting the respect he commanded outside of the Montreal enclave of St-Leonard–the kind of respect which resulted in him being posted to Denmark when the sh*t hit the fan in a recent corruption scandal.

Since the nickname of “Boobie” is already taken by the (infamous) John Cerasani, we feel that “Cheeseball” is a fitting name for the capo di tutti capi in the Liberal Party. Yes, we happily imagine young Cheeseball Gagliano, the type of fat kid who kept stuffing his face at the corner stoop, raising money for Liberal prime ministers past and present… Another great Kanuckistani!

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